I know how you feel betsy, I miss my sis everyday (pictured). maybe you met her when she came to stay at timberhill for about 2 weeks. I can't remember if that was 1st or 2nd year.
anyway she was accidentally killed in 1976. the concept of time healing these wounds isn't true, would you agree? do you have any pics of jenny you could post here?

Time does not heal this kind of wound. I don't want it to. I mean, having the pain somehow means I still have Jen. But I do know that I am handling it differently. The first year after her death my dreams were filled with such pain and anguish. I always saw Jenny sick and in pain and I would be unable to help her and would be lost in torrential floods of tears. I would wake exhausted and aching and the tears would continue to flow. I hated the dreams but embraced the pain. It is now 2 1/2 years since Jenny died and I have had dreams of Jenny healthy and laughing. I like those dreams. I still ache from missing her, wanting her to be here to see her kids grow. I let Jenny talk to me, I hear her voice in my head laughing at my silliness. Jenny was so practical. I can now laugh back at her. I am so impractical. I will let her goodness flow through me. I have a lifetime of lessons that I am still learning from Jenny. I carry the pain, I embrace it and I move forward and let Jenny's tears and laughter roll through me.
ReplyDelete